INTERVIEW WITH MOM
INTERVIEW WITH MOM
| ARCHIVES (2004)
| ARCHIVES (2003)
| ARCHIVES (2002)
| ARCHIVES (2001)
Mom Report February 6, 2005
The Sun was out, very little clouds as I drove to Sanford. I stop at a Walmart, got a few items
and the drove to Apex for Gas and I was on my way to Sanford. The drive was uneventful. I set my cruise control to 60mph (5 under the speed limit) and let the more impatient drivers whiz on by me.
As usual, I had great thoughts on my mind :-)
Above is a picture on mom with her new glasses. Look Classy, don't they? She really likes them. Thanks again, Doug.
Now to the report. As I started down the corridor to Mom's room, she was heading my way in her wheelchair. It took all of her effort to push the wheels just a little bit. Her face lit up as I called her name. She looked up and said, " I was afraid you weren't coming". I asked why? Isn't there snow or ice on Raleigh was her reply. No mom, it is bright and sunny just like here.
We talked our little talk for a while and she said "I want to get in Bed". She looked like she was going to try to get out of her wheelchair and on to the bed by herself. As weak as she is, I knew that it would end up in a disaster. Me with my wrist in a brace could not be much help. So I got one of the staffers. Even with a strong staffer, It was a trial getting mom into bed. Her legs don't seem to co-operate.
30 minutes later, she wanted to go to the bathroom and the staffer went through the same motions again. Once MOm was back in bed, she went to sleep.
Areas of positives:
Newspaper was on mom's bed. I believe mom had been reading it.
Areas of concern:
Curtains are not pulled away from the window. They are draped over the heater.
Bed is not more than 1 foot away from heater.
From a maybe legal standpoint. I told Erin (staffer in charge) about both the curtains and the bed. She said "we will take care of it". She didn't write it down and it was almost the end of her shift. I should have taken pictures of it, but will do so on my next trip, if they haven't "taken care of it".
Mom Report January 30, 2005
It was around 35 degrees, wind was blowing, when I stopped to gas up in Apex. I started the pump and it took 5 minutes to pump $5 worth of gas. I couldn't stand it any longer. I paid for the gas and headed on to Sanford. I would just complete the gas-up in Sanford. Pumps would have to be faster!!
I had alreaady forgotten to bring a calendar along for mom, but I remembered also that she need some kleenex tissues. I stopped at a Drug store in Sanford and got her some.
Mom was in her wheel chair when I arrived. Just starring at the wall. I turned her around to face me and we began our usual conversation. I noticed that she wasn't wearing any glasses. I asked her about it. She said they were somewhere around there. After talking awhile, I started looking for them. I found them and remarked, "wonder when you are getting your new glasses". "oh! she said. A man brought them by last night." I asked where were they. She had told him to put the glasses in her chest drawer. I got them out. Boy! It was great to see clean and clear glasses for mom.
Her newspaper was there as well!!! Things are looking up!! She began reading her newspaper while I took a 15 minute nap. Mom knew when to wake me. I told her not to let me sleep long and she didn't! Fifteen minutes almost on the dot.
I asked her how did she liked her hospital stay. She said it was good!! What was good about it, I asked. It was calm and peaceful!! I know Ashewood has to get on her nerves some times.
When I was leaving, I talked to the staffer who had called my home about mom's fall last wednesday ( or tuesday ) about the telephone list. I told her she needed to get with the person who keeps all that data and get an updated phone list. I told her if she was unsuccessfull, I would bring one down next Sunday..
When I got to my car, another staffer came up to the car. She told me that Mom had been getting her paper, but they were not letting the paper stay in there very long, taking it away when she had finished reading it. In effect, I told her that was a bunch of baloney, since I get to Sanford in the early afternoon on Sunday and NO paper was there the last sunday I visited. I told her mom doesn't read the paper that fast! She agreed that they usually waited a couple of days before retrieving the old papers.
Another pre-planned fabrication shot down by jc.
That is it for now. I hope to take a picture of mom with her new glasses next Sunday. They look different, but I can't describe what the difference is.
Mom Report January 16, 2005
Good Evening All!
This was a slightly shorten visit to see Mom. I had to get back to Raleigh to deliver a computer that I had repaired. Plus get to church and give some last minute instructions to a lady who was going to use my dvd player to show a dvd during her class.
Mom is getting weaker, slower, and not as communicative as in the past. She will answer your questions, but don't expect her to carry a conversation. She is just not into it. I brought her a piece of cheese cake from the Macaroni Grill. It had a huge strawberry with it. Mom didn't have the power or the hand to eye coordination to move the strawberry out of the way. She did have the strength to devour the cheese cake. I asked her if she was getting full. She said yes, but this is to good not to eat all of it. And she did.
No new eyeglasses in sight.
Mom has new flowers in her basket. The cactus is in bloom. All in all the flower window sill is nice looking.
We had a little snow, sleet, this morning but no sticky.
That is it for now
Mom Report January 9, 2005
Something has happened! No one except Flo and Myself have read the mom report of last week. Perhaps, you didn't get my email saying a new mom report was available.
Time is getting short. To summarize yesterday's visit to Mom. She was no longer in the bed. She was in her wheel chair. We chatted our little chat. Nothing major to report, except -- Mom still does have new glasses.
Need to get ready for work.
Mom Report January 2, 2005
Has it been this long since I updated the Mom Report? I thought I had includes a report about the visit of Flo, myself, Don and Sarah. Evidently not. I apologize for that oversight.
Today's visit is becoming rather routine. Mom was lying in bed covered up. She said she was just resting her eyes -- I don't know. We chatted a while. Mostly me talking her either smiling or sayings just a few words. It is getting to the point of a monologue. Not much dialog. I usually just started with what's been happing in wendell, scattering a few comments from emails or phone conversations with Don and Doug.
Mom said she had not received her new glasses.
The rails were up on her bed. Legally, they can't do that without a doctor's written permission, but with mom -- It is probably a good idea.
I noticed that they didn't empty mom's water container, just put more ice in it. I hope they clean those out every once in a while. I remember not too many months ago that there was a black scum in the container and I cleaned it out with hot water.
It looks like the newspaper has either been terminated or someone is getting it before it reaches mom.
Has anyone received word about Ashewood taking mom to see Dr. Mangum on December 30, 2004? I didn't think so. I would not have known except I went to use the bathroom and found a specimen bottle with Mom's name and Dr. Mangums name on it. I checked with the MedTech and she looked in the records and found that she indeed did go to see Dr. Mangum for a uinary problem.
I thought they were supposed to let us know of any medical problems.
Did I tell you that Mom stayed in the bed the entire time I was there? Medtech said she would make certain that she went to supper.
Don: Mom needs a calendar. I intend to make her one, but one of your fancy calendars might impress her more.
That is it for now.
|Mom Report December 12, 2004
There is a section on US Highway 1 going to Sanford that gives you an unobstructed view of the sky. All trees, etc are away from the road. I looked into that light blue sky as I drove to Sanford. Only a few very high thin clouds marked the sky as if someone had used an air brush to paint them against that blue backroung. What a sight!!!
When I arrived at Ashewood, the harshness of the real world slapped at me. The rest home must be understaffed again. No sign of any of the staffers. The strong smell of pee as you walk down the hall. Even in Mom's room, that odor didn't go away. Someone had turn the fan of the hvac unit in mom's room, possibly to thin out the odor.
Mom was stretched out in her bed, head rared back, with the mouth wide open, sleeping away. I waited a little while hoping that she would wake up. Finally, she did. She said she was just "resting her eyes" -- Yeah, sure!
The rails of her bed were up ( According to law, they can only be raised with a Doctor's permission). Mom didn't know why, but she suspected they didn't want her to fall out of bed and injury her hand again.
We talked a while, napped a while. I found out that Ron is supposed to be getting her a sweater for Christmas. She still hasn't confided in me what she wants. Guess Santa will have to figure it out for himself.
That's about it for now.
Mom Report - December 5, 2004
When I arrived in Sanford today, I was greeted at the front door of Ashewood by Erin, the staffer that called my home in Wendell and told Flo that Mom had fallen attempting to get in bed the night before. As I reported at the time they took her to see Dr. Mangum who pronounced the injury as a bruised hand. Erin wanted to warn me about how bad her hand looked. Mom had already told me in a phone conversation that it looked bad.
Both Mom and the ashewood staffer didn't really prepare me for what I saw when I got to mom's room. The tips of mom's fingers were the proper flesh tone but the rest of the hand past the wrist was almost black. I took a picture of it which will be on the website shortly. Mom said that Dr. Mangum told her that it would probably turn all sorts of colors before it turned back to flesh color. Mom is not upset by it. It doesn't seem to bother her at all.
Mom sounds tired, sometimes "thicked tongue, slurry". She wanted to get in bed and "rest". I was about to help her when one of the staffers came by and began to help her. Mom could not seem to move her feet. Said they would stucked to the floor. This is reminiscent of the time I was staying at Mom's and attempting to watch her. I tried to get her to the bath room and her feet wouldn't move. Just like she was sending signals but nothing was getting through. This turned out to be a Uinary tract infection, which she seems to go through ever so oftern. I plan on calling Nina at Ashewood tomorrow and she if they can at least take her temperature.
Mom and I talked our little talk. It was short because mom wanted to rest her eyes and told me to take a nap. When she finally got through resting her eyes, there was only about 45 minutes left to chit chat.
You can see the picture of Mom's hand at:
MOM Report - Thanksgiving Day
What a great, sunny day for Travel, I thought as I pulled out my driveway to head for Sanford. Did I have everything? Camcorder, still cameras ( digital and film), Tripods, and extra video tape -- yup-- Had it all
When I was about fifteen minutes from Sanford, I called Mom to reminder her that I was going to golden corral to get our thanksgiving dinners. She had not forgotten. I arrived at Golden Corral about 11:30am. It appeared that there was only one parking place left in the entire lot. I filled the containers and headed for Ashewood.
Mom was waiting for me at the front door. One of the staff offered to push mom to that vending machine area. When we got there another family had taken it over. We retreated to the lunch room which was almost vacant by the time we arrived. The staff provided us with drinks and a table for our food.
I began setting up my camcorder while, Mom was looking over her food.. I told her to go ahead at start. I would catch up with her. Finally got my camcorder setup. Aimed the camera mainly at mom and started to roll.
Our menu consisted of Ham, turkey, (both cut fresh), mash potatoes, gravy, fried okra, cranberry sauce, and rolls. Our dessert was pumpkin pie. Afterwards, we returned to mom's room where we took a short nap.
Mom's bruising has gone away. She seemed in pretty good spirits. We talked for a while and then I headed south to meet with Flo and her mom for the final portion of my thanksgiving day.
Later, I hope to have some still shots of the feast. Possibly some video clips as well.
There was no Sunday visit to Sanford.
Mom Report November 21, 2004
What a bright, Sunny Day !!! A great day to head to Sanford! Well, My head didn't think it was such a great day. I started the day off with shooting pains in my head. My doctor has said it was because of my neck vertabrae rubbing against each other. Something about the cushioning between the vertabrae disentegrating. I took a pain pill, one of those that says "not to operate machine/cars" while taking. I got drowsy a couple of times at church, but it didn't seem to affect the drive to Sanford.
Mom was in her room when I arrived. Her room mate was outside the room and one of the "staffers" was chatting with the room mate. Mom's face lit up when she saw me. I really think she enjoys my visits. For that matter, she enjoys any of the boy's visits.
Mom's bruises are almost gone away. Her voice seems weak these days, but she still carries on a conversation. I brought her some more pumpkin cheesecake from the Olive Garden. She seems to really enjoy the treat! I took pictures of her eating the cheesecake. I will post them later.
No exciting news from the Sanford scene. Mom seemed to be without any major problems.
Thursday, I will go to Sanford and buy MOM a thanksgiving dinner from the Golden Corral restaurant. They are always open for thanksgiving. I had hoped that some of the other brothers would be there as well, but no one has announced that they are coming, so it will be another Mom and Jc thanksgiving dinner. If I get really industrious, I will take my video camera along and record the festivities
Mom Report November 14, 2004
Another Sunday Lunch with Flo before I began the trip to Sanford. This time at RED LOBSTER. Food was the usual fare at Red Lobster. We ate and I went on my merry way to Sanford. Flo went home and packed, then left to be with her Mom for the week.
When I arrived at Mom's room, her room mate was outside of the room. She said, "your mom is asleep and has been sleeping a lot the last couple of days". I replied "good! I need to take a nap".
This was an incorrect statement on her roommate's part. Mom was in her wheelchair with her eyes fixed on the wall. I turned her around to face me and we began her chat.
Either mom's hearing is not as good as it used to be or I speak too fast. She asked me a quite a few times what did I say. I would repeat at a slower pace and she would under stand.
Mom's arm bruise has almost gone away, but the bruise on her hand is still pretty dark. Mom may be falling off the bed, because someone has put the rail on the wall side up on the bed. Mom doesn't remember any falls though. She doesn't remember any calls from Ron either.
Since I don't see any signs of Ron checking the web site, I wonder if he calls at all?? I guess I will never know.
We talked until time for me to leave, with nothing important past between the two of us. All in all, an uneventful visit.
Mom Report November 7, 2004
It was another sunny Sunday for the trip to Sanford. Flo and I had eaten at Olive Garden and because of the extreme slowness of our main course arriving to the table, I expressed my dissatisfaction to the waiter. He mumbled something about the kitchen being a little bit behind and I grumbled something back at him.
As a good waiter should he reported it to his supervisor, who appeared mid-ways through our eating of the food. I asked his name "todd'. I repeated his name several times, telling him that I try to learn all the names of inidividuals that work at Olive Garden (one of my favorite places to eat). I then asked how Cindy, the district manger was doing.
All of this rambling netted me a slice of pumpkin cheese cake divided into two pieces in take out containers in a bag to go to Sanford.
Mom was in bed when I arrived. Her room mate said she was in bed most of Saturday as well. I woke her, encouraged her to get up and we sat an talked. Then we partook of the cheesecake. The cooks didn't do a good job of dividing it so mom got the larger piece and she almost beat me through. It was very good.
Mom's bruise on the arm is still there -- about the same size, but has turned to a dark yellow. She now has a bruise on her left hand as well. the bruises don't hurt, but she considers them "ugly".
After about 40 minutes of chit-chat, Doug arrived. Yes, that's right -- Doug!! Said he had business in the area and decided to drop in to see mom. Mom really enjoyed the visit from both of us. I left at 4pm, and Doug said he would probably stay until mom went to supper.
That's it for now.
Mom Report October 31, 2004
Addition to Mom report ( Nov 1, 2004) I called Ashewood on Monday about the bruise and the funny looking eye, plus Mom's doctor visit. There is NO one person that knows all about Mom at Ashewood. They said they would call me back. It took almost 2 hours for them to call back and in this time period, I had created a fax to send to them including pictures of the bruise and the eye. I kept the fax for back up of the incident.
First, Mom did have a Doctor's visit. A follow up on her recent trip to the hospital. She also received a pneumonia shot while there -- No Flu shot though.
The bruise was apparently caused by mom getting it caught between her body and the wheelchair arm rest. It was baseball size on Sunday but Nina indicated that it was less than baseball size and more than golf ball size. With yellowing around the edges. Since Mom is on cumendin, she is more likely to bruise. Eye seems to be normal today.
It was a great day for the trip to Sanford. Mom was alone in her room. Shortly after I arrived I noticed a large bruise on her right arm. She does not know how it happened.
She later mention going to see Dr. Mangum, but does not know why. Usually, Doug or myself get a call about any dr visits, but I have received any word. Hope Doug has. I plan on calling Ashewood this morning about it. Could not find a staffer when I started to leave.
Pictures of the bruise and other stuff will appear tonight.
When I say "big", the bruise was about the size of a baseball.
Mom Report October 24, 2004
Weather was not agreeable Sunday, as I headed to Sanford. It had been raining earlier in the day. No sunshine, just dreary overcast skies.
When I came to Mom's room, she was not outside as usually I find her, but was in her bed, covered up. I asked her if she was okay. She said she was but wanted to take a nap. I said "go ahead, I will take one too". Mom replied, " go ahead and talk if you want to, I like hearing you talk.". "That's okay, I will take a nap and when we are rested, we will talk."
I "napped" for an hour, the most I have "napped" in a long time. Usually, I get a fifteen minute "power nap" and I am fine. I waited, but mom kept on sleeping. The staffer came in and made sure she was dry and left. I kept waiting. Finally, I decide mom must need the rest more than she needs to talk with me.
I left a peppermint pattie with her room mate, plus one for her room mate and took off for Raleigh.
Best I can report is that Mom is resting comfortably.
Mom Report October 17, 2004
Mom's room mate was outside keep vigil over the hall while Mom was still in the room. I went into the room, sat down and began the usual chit-chat. After a few moments, I share with her our "goodie" for the day -- Olive Garden's "Black tie chocolate moose cake". ummm good!
After some time, I finally saw mom's latest creation from the activities director's basket. This time it was a little sign on the door, titled "It's Fall Y'all". Didn't have my camera, but will get a photo of it next go round.
Flo has gone to be with her Mom, who is in the hospital at Lumberton. Did not know of the telephone number of the hospital, so pulled out my trusty toshiba laptop and hooked into my cellphone and got on to the big internet cloud. Shortly thereafter, I had the telephone number. Didn't have to do that, because Flo called me shortly thereafter with the telephone number.
Flo's Mom had passed out at a church function on Friday and they took her in for observation and testing. So far no reason found for the "passing out".
Did find out that her mom's eyesight is so bad that she can't see her own face in the mirror. Someone will have to be staying with her from now on. Flo will take her mom home on monday and stay with her until tuesday. Flo will return to Wendell early Tuesday to attend the Kix deejay/engineer re-union at the Angus barn, then probably will go back to help her mom. Lola, one of Flo's sisters will be with her on Tuesday. Not sure who else will participate in watching over her mom.
Our mom is doing good, except I notice that her voice is not as strong as it used to be. Her mind is still good. She asks me to repeat things sometimes, Not sure what that might mean, but I will keep tabs on it.
She never mention "Frank" by name. Did mention "her sweetie" once.
Nothing else to report. Until next time.
Mom Report October 10, 2004
Mom and her room mate were in their room when I arrived. This is a most unusual setting. Most of the time, they are outside the room acting like "hall monitors".
They didn't seem to acknowledge each other. It was as if they were not on speaking terms. Her room mate went outside the room when I came in.
Our chat was like most other days. I brought her a peppermint pattie which she consumed as if she had never eaten one before. Taste treats like this make an otherwise dull day seem much better.
As usual, I try to have a least one question from the past. Sometimes it is a repeat question. I know that sometimes she doesn't remember as well as other times.
I asked about Grandpa Jones. I remembered that he was into home construction. Mom seemed to verify that as well.
She still doesn't remember anything about Grandpa Jones writing any songs. She does remember that he invented a mail box.
At one time, Mom didn't have her glasses on and I wondered where they were. She said they were on the bed, but she could see just as well without them. She picked them up and began the ritual of cleaning the lenses. Something that is impossible to do. Maybe Mom will get some new glasses for Christmas.
That is it for this time. More next week.
Mom Report October 3, 2004
"SHE'S THE HATEFULIEST WOMAN I KNOW" !!! No not mom! Another resident that wants to come into her room and Mom is very territorial :-) Mom blurted this out after the woman attempted to come into the room while I was there.
I told mom that was going to be my lead line on my MOM report this time. She laughed.
We talked about the usual stuff.
Each time, I try to have a question about family history. This time, I asked Mom about Grandpa Jones' funeral. I remembered that two of the songs that were sung at the funeral were announced as songs written by him. Mom couldn't remember. I guess I will have to talk to Prichard Jones about that.
She only mentioned "Frank" once this time.
Mom looked pretty good. She doesn't talk as much as she used to. She prefers listening to me ramble on about work, home, and play.
Nothing else to report, except I am batching it this week. Flo and one her sisters, Lola, left Wendell Sunday Morning for Columbus, Ohio. They made it there Sunday Night. Now they are in Indiana. Will leave Indiana on Thursday for Nashville, TN. They are visiting friends they haven't seen for over 30 years.
Another MOM report next week.
September 26, 2004 - Mom Report
Billowy clouds began forming as I drove to Sanford. Remnants of Jeanne, I guessed.
Mom was waiting in her room as usual. We chatted about the usual stuff, with interruptions from several "residents" and the usual embarrasing interruption when the staffer comes in to check to see if mom is "dry or wet".
Mom seemed in good spirits. She only mentioned Frank once. I took a picture of her latest handiwork and will post it later when I have the time.
Julie ( mom's nextdoor neighbor on dellwood street came by and left Mom a slice of chocolate cake. A big slice at that.
That is about it for today.
September 19, 2004 - Mom Report
Flo went along with me this Sunday. I guess to make sure that I delivered Mom's new slippers and maybe to protect me from any residual anger left over from last week.
It was a peaceful trip to Sanford. Sun was bright. No clouds in the sky and the traffic was light. When we arrived at Ashewood, Mom was not in her usual place outside of her room. We wonder where she was, but as we neared the room, we saw the edge of her old slipper peeping through the open door to her room.
Her room mate was no where nearby, so mom was attempting to make up her mind whether to stay in her room or come outside. Our arrival changed all of that
Mom tried on her new slippers. She seemed to like them. We talked a little while, then we had raspberry cheesecake from Olive Garden. I had bought one slice and had the waitress get it cut into two slices. One for me and one for mom (Flo abstained).
We talked about the usual stuff. Survival items in my back pocket. Whether anyone has called her lately, etc. Flo took a nap while Mom and I continued to talk. Mom's voice is still a little week, but she seems to be otherwise okay.
Mom had another activity thingee. I didn't get a chance to look at it carefully, but it looks like a picture of mom with a border around it. I didn't have my camera, but will get a picture of it on the next trip.
Mom tells me also that the Activities director gets them to go through some exercises each time they are in their "class". I think it is more than once a week. Still don't know who this activity director is, but intend to find out.
That's it for this go round
September 12, 2004 - Mom Report
Another Sunday, Another trip to Sanford. This time I managed to get Mom and Flo upset with me. Seems as though Mom needed new slippers and Flo bought some yesterday. I managed to forget to take them to Sanford. Mom was very disappointed that I didn't have the slippers. She made me promise to bring them next Sunday.
I got Mom to show me her latest activities handiwork. This time it was a small hand fan (see photo above). Very neat, I am still trying to figure out what material was used to create it. Mom still can't remember the activities director's name, but that's not bad, one of the staffers stop in and I asked her. She didn't know either.
The staffer did provide me with some ideas about how the activities director get's her materials. She buys them as kits over the internet.
I did most of the talking today. Mom's got a little raggedy throat and her voice was at a whisper level. I managed to record 1.5 hours of our conversation. I will clip out a lot of my babbling before putting it on the internet for all to hear .
September 5, 2004 - Mom Report
Another Sunday is here and this time Flo accompanied me to Sanford to see Mom. The trip was restful for me since Flo was driving her car ( Better on gas and more comfortable than mine). We had the usual conversations, plus Mom showed her latest handicraft .
Mom complained about her glasses. I tried to clean them, but thee is no way for them to look clean. Apparently, the inner filter layer has separated and make the glasses look "splotchy".
It appears that the activities director has encourage all of her attendees to get books from her library to read. Mom has a paperback to read. I think the name is "stranger at my side" ( or something similar to that.)
|August 29, 2004 - Mom Report